Episode 1: The Star Born

Narrator: The year is After Colony 195-
Director: CUT! 216! NOT 195! 2-1-6!
Narrator: Sorry.
Director: Take 2! And… action!
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Noin: I SAID TURN IT DOWN!!!!!! I CAN FEEL THE BALLS SHAKING DOWN HERE!
Siduri: *kills the music* Y’screwed up the line, Mom.
Noin: o_o; oops.
Director: … CUT!
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*Sidra slips the mask on for the first time, tries to take it off. It doesn’t* Sidra: Sh*t! Who put super glue on the inside of the ()!&#$ mask?!
Siduri: *whistles innocently*
Director: CUT! Cleanup crew!
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Sidra: Siduri? Y’in there? *barges in, points a gun at Siduri, who falls over* Omae o korosu!
Director: *falls over* Cut!
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Sidra: Fine! *slams door and the set falls down behind her* …. Oops.
Director: Cut! Stage crew!
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Siduri: Women are scary, right Dad?
Milliardo: Damned right.
Noin: MILLIARDO!
Director: *sweatdrops* Cut!
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Siduri: You're WHAT?!
Sidra: I said- … What did I say? Line!!
Director: CUT! Line! “I am going  to go join the defense corps training school! Y'know, for mobile suit pilots?” Take 2…. And… ACTION!
Siduri: You’re WHAT?!
Sidra: I said- …. Um…. Um…. Er….. Oh yeah! I am going…
Director: CUT!
Siduri: …. Dumb blond.
Sidra: *whacks Siduri*
Siduri: OW!
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Sidra: 'Stupider'? Are you saying my goal is stupid?!
Siduri: Yes!
Director: Cut! Siduri! Read your LINES instead, please. Ready? Take 2… and…. ACTION!
Sidra: 'Stupider'? Are you saying my goal is stupid?!
Siduri: YES! *falls over cracking up*
Sidra: … I can’t work like this.
Director: CUT!
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Sidra: *puts on the mask, looks in mirror, runs down stairs* HEY DAD! THIS IS WHAT YOU’D LOOK LIKE WITH BREAST IMPLANTS!
Milliardo, Noin, and everybody else: *falls over*
Director: Cut…. *slaps hand to forehead.*
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Relena: It was my brother. Sidra seems to have run away. He was wondering if she'd come by here.  Have you seen her?
Heero: She’s backstage beating up Siduri.
Director: CUT!
Siduri: *back stage* I’M SORRY ALREADY! YOU AREN’T A DUMB BLOND! HEEEEELP!!!!
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Ariana: Let me guess, Uncle Zechs told her no?
Relena: I believe so, or else she wouldn't have run away, now would she?
Ariana: Suppose so. Anyways... I haven't seen her, and I'm kinda working on a giant weapon of mass destruction, so could you just go away now please?
Relena: O.o;
Director: CUT! THAT’S THE LINE! ….. er…. NOT THE LINE! ><;
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Yoshino: *walks into the house* LUCY! I’M HOOOOME!
Director: This isn’t I Love Lucy! CUT! …. Take 2… and…. ACTION!
Yoshino: *walk into the house* I’m home!
Relena: Oh, welcome home. Your-
Yoshino: *pulls a gun out and points it at Relena* Omae o korosu!
Heero: *falls over*
Director: CUT!! ><;; You nut cases…
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Heero: Our trip to Venus was canceled. They don’t want to talk.
Yoshino: Oh yeah. I heard about that. A couple of our reports say they might be building an army... Time to pull out the nukes on ‘em, huh?
Relena: Yes- Wait a minute! That’s not your line!
Yoshino: *cracks up*
Director: Cut……
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Heero: Noin called the other day. They're making new suits like the Gundams in case it's true.
Yoshino: I know, I was offered a position to pilot one of them. They also offered a cool car if I take it!
Heero: …
Director: CUT! SHINO! ><;
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Wufei: Where are you going?
Meiran: SORE WA HIMITSU DESU! ^_^
Xelloss: I’ve been such a good influence… ||^_^||
Wufei: O.o;
Director: CUT! XELLOSS! GET BACK TO THE SLAYERS! … Take 2… and…. Action!
Wufei: Where are you going?
Meiran: Out. Wanna come?
Wufei: *falls over*
Director: CUT! Meiran! Get it right! Take 3…. And….. action!
Wufei: Where are you going?
Meiran: *annoying tone* Whhhhhhhyyyyyyyy? ^-^
Wufei: Because I’m your father.
Meiran: *annoying tone* Whhhhhhhyyyyyyyy? ^-^
Director: *annoying tone* Cuuuuuuuuuuut.
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Meiran: I'm old enough to take care of myself and what I wear, Daddy. We aren't living in the Dark Ages.
Wufei: Cover up.
Meiran: You don’t know I’m a stripper, do you?
Wufei: WHAT!?! Meiran! ><;
Director: CUT!
Meiran: *cracks up* YOU SHOULD SEE THE LOOK ON YOUR FACE!!
Wufei: o_o
Meiran: …? Breathe, Daddy. It was a joke.
Wufei: @_@
Director: Medic….
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Wufei: Why were you late?
Meiran: Sore wa himitsu desu! ^_^
Wufei: *twitches* Meiran!
Director: CUT! I’m gonna kill Xelloss…
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Meiran: G'night, Daddy. Have fun with Mom.
Wufei: *chokes* MEIRAN!!!! ><;
Director: CUT!!!!! Augh…. Weirdoes…
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Sidra: Hello. I'd like to enroll in the defense corps academy...
Receptionist: All right then, what's your name?
Sidra: Merquise. Roku Merquise.
Director: CUT!
Siduri: *off stage* No more James Bond movies for Sidra…
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One: Well, I'd say that went over fairly well...
Sidra: *takes wig off* I'LL GET YOU FOR THE GLUE, SIDURI! *chases Siduri*
Siduri: DREAM ON! *flees*
Firefury: Or not.