-You own an ocarina
-... And it's the blue one from Songbird Ocarinas that looks like the Ocarina of Time
-... And you can play it fluently
-You are afraid to look up at night, fearing that the moon will have a big scary face on it
-You have a REALLY bad day (or days), and play the Song of Time on your Ocarina, and are very surprised when time doesn't rewind to The First Day.
-You put on a mask and are quite surprised when nothing happens.
-You own a sword
-...And put yourself in the hospital trying to learn how to do a spin attack
-You tear up the neighbor's bushes in search of rupees, hearts, and other goodies
-You tear up the neighbor's landscaping in search of hidden grottos
-You see a lizard and run from the room screaming "DODONGO! IT'S A DODONGO!"
-You talk to rocks. When asked about this, you try to explain it's actually a Goron.
-You put on a red shirt and attempt to go inside a volcano and suffer severe burns and poisoning.
-You put on a blue shirt, weigh yourself down, and dive into a lake. You get rescued and taken to the hospital to recover from nearly drowning.
-You are deathly afraid of pigs.
-You actually pay someone to make a custom sword for you that looks like the Master Sword (or any of the other swords from the series)
-Green is your color. 'Nuff said.
-You go looking around in forests in search of legendary swords.
-You go looking around for a portal to the Dark World (Sacred Realm, Evil Realm, etc etc)
-You worship Din, Nayru, and Farore.
-... And let's not forget the Goddess of Time!
-You get a triforce symbol tattooed on your right hand
-You SWEAR your school principal/boss is Gannon in disguise
-... So you go in search of the Master Sword and the Temple of Time so you can stop his/her evil
-Your license plate reads something like "HROTIME", "EVILKNG", "TRIFRCE", "OCARINA" or something along those lines.
-If you're a guy, you think the Gerudo are incredibly cute
-... Especially pointing scimitars at you
-If you're a girl, you think Link is incredibly hot
-... especially when he's older or wearing the Fierce Deity Mask (mmm... large swords... =p)
-You can actually pull off the quick spin attack where you rotate the control stick and hit the button.
-You write LoZ fanfiction
-... and post it, no matter how good or bad it may be
-You have figured out the order in which all the Zelda games occur. (IE- Ocarina of Time first, then Majora's Mask, then Link to the Past, etc etc)
-You and another fan get into a lengthy argument about the exact chronological order of the events in the games
-...this argument turns violent
-...and eventually involves swords, shields, arrows, a hookshot, and a boomerang.
-Your children don't play cops and robbers. They play Heroes and Evil Kings.
-You participate in an LoZ based roleplay.
-... and you're the one that started it.
-You and another fan get into an intense debate. If Ganon tries to take his revenge on Link's descendants, who did Link from Ocarina of Time end up having kids with to provide said descendants?
-You write your term paper about Hyrule and its history, and how the land has changed since Ganon was first sealed away.
-... and actually get an A on it.
-You and a friend get into a huge argument over the correct spelling of "Gan(n?)on"
-You get into an intense theological debate with someone concerning God and the three Hyrulean goddesses.
-You take the time to develop a theory as to the evolution of the Great Fairies. From scantily clad, crazy nuts with annoying laughs to pleasant, winged fairies that don't laugh like banshees... How DID that happen? (Not that we aren't grateful.. =p)
-You own ANYTHING LoZ related- the board game from the 80s, imported soundtrack CDs, imported manga, the old cartoons, Nintendo Power's Link to the Past comic...
-... about the LttP comic... you not only own the graphic novel version of it in mint condition, you also have the issues of the magazine it ran in, also in mint condition and kept under glass.
-You carry a sword and shield with you everywhere you go
-... and have been arrested for it several times.
-You've been in a really bad situation and whipped out your ocarina and played the Oath to Order.
-... then boggle at the fact the four giants didn't show up and save you.
-Link is god, Ganon is the devil. 'Nuff said.
-When walking through a particularly large puddle, you keep checking to make sure your reflection didn't disappear, which would be a sure sign you're about to face your dark self in battle.
-You can identify any piece of Zelda music from any of the games in under 5 seconds
-You think that Link's swimming stroke is actually possible and effective
-... and have tried it
-... and almost drowned
-... but then, with that sword and shield weighing you down, not to mention those boots with the iron sewn into them...
-You mistake a pair of rollerblades for hoverboots.
-You curl up on the floor and attempt to roll somewhere
-... and you're surprised you end up in the hospital with a severe concussion?
-In an attempt to generate an electrical field like Zora Link, you stick your finger in an electrical socket, or a fork in a toaster.
-... Again, you're surprised you wake up in the hospital?
-You get a horse and attempt to train it to come when you play Epona's Song.
-You have a bad dream and immediately assume it means you're about to be summoned to undertake a journey to save the world.
-You can sympathize with Tingle's predicament of not having a fairy companion.
-You can somehow relate ANY topic of discussion to the Zelda series. (Giant mecha? Goht!)
-You can do a perfect rendition of Link's "Well excuuuuuuuuuuuse me, Princess!" from the cartoons.
-You know and fully understand the circumstances behind this line- "ZELDA LOVES ME! ZELDA LOVES ME!"
-You write a Link x Ganon yaoi fanfiction. (Firefury: I've seen one out there. Be warned. *cringes*)
-You swear you got a phone call from the Skull Kid first time you saw the Moon impact sequence in
Majora's Mask, and he laughed his creepy little laugh at you for losing.
-You spent days locked in your underground fallout shelter just in case The One's attempt to save us
from the parallel world's falling moon failed.
-You actually BELIEVED that whole Z-science and JRAMOA thing.
-You can't seem to understand why people look at you oddly for running around carrying a bush,
pot, or some other object over your head.
-Whenever you get something new, you hold it up over your head expecting an explanation to
appear explaining it.
-... You find it odd that this does not, in fact, happen in real life.
-You dress up as Link, Gannon, Darunia, Darmani, etc for Halloween
-... even though you're a girl
-You dress up as Zelda, Ruto, Malon, Marin, Saria, etc for Halloween
-... even though you're a guy
-You dress up as the scariest thing you can think of- the Terminan Moon.
-You have had, shall we say, 'indecent' fantasies about some of the series more... 'unique' characters.
(Ruto, Darunia....)
-You actually make your own masks
-...and expect them to work
-...including that replica of the Fierce Deity's Mask that you went to so much trouble to make
-...especially since some punk stole your Majora's Mask replica.
-You constantly wonder if all your existance is merely the dream of some godlike entity
-You wander around dressed as a Gerudo
-...even though you're a guy
-You can spot two or more constellations in the Terminan night sky
-You can spot two or more constellations in the Hyrulean night sky (If so, then you are a far better
astronomer than I.)